Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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