put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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