I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
