I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Randomize
