remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Randomize
