I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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