Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
