As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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