Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
