and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
