Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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