exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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