Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
