They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
