I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
