this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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