OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
