Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
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