Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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