Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
