i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I just blew my weed a kiss
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
