There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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