The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize