I want to make a zoo with you.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
