idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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