what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize