why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
