Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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