Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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