They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
We just shotgunned beers for America
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
