Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
