We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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