I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
