that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize