omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
