you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize