And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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