Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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