i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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