There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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