We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
We don't watch enough power rangers
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
