I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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