nut hugger
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize