Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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