I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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