so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
