I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
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