Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
