Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
