dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
