hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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